Between rage and serenity

You can achieve a power like no other

Feeling empty

So much of my life, time, money, effort, blood, sweat and tears was poured into the EMT class (and this semester in general)... I feel like Frodo and Sam after they destroyed the ring. What do we do now that it is over. I am changed... I am emotionally and physically changed. I cannot unlearn or unsee the things I have. I cannot go back and not know the skills I do. I put so much effort into the class to just to end it so anti-climatically feels a bit morose leaving me as if I was moribund. I cannot go back from having witnessed deaths and graphic medical emergencies and learning how to deal with it. I just know how to now. I feel changed but I feel empty. I want to use my knowledge but I guess it is that end of finals feeling where you have a moment to ponder and reflect upon everything you learned, saw, did and experienced and the efforts and turmoil that you put into it to get there and then just to see it end is bittersweet. Whelp, can't wait till next semester.

Week 3 of Junior Firefighter training

Last Thursday I had the great opportunity to be able to learn basic search and rescue techniques when you are in a burning building. I also was taught how to open up a fire hydrant and connect the 5in and 2.5 in hoses to it in order to be ready for responding to a fire. It was very informative and very much so hands-on training that I just absolutely enjoyed. Every week I go I feel like a little kid again yet also a mature adult being able to learn these important and life-saving techniques.

I bought 4 books

I purchased 4 books online
The book of five rings
The tao of jeet kune do
Bruce lee fighting methods all the volumes
And bushido the classic portrait of samurai culture
When they get here in the mail after finals are over and in between studying for clep exams I will read them and write what I think, especially concerning the Tao of Jeet Kune Do.

Physically and Mentally tired

The feeling of being so physically exhausted after reaching your limit of ahat your body can handle and then pushing your mind mentally so you can keep processing and staying awake days on end working hard non stop, I feel that way too often, maybe I push myself too much but it never feels like enough, I wish my body was not contained by this mortal being that I am. I want to do more but sometimes I can't do it all.
I feel exhausted, mentally and physically.

Restlessness

It seems too often these days that I find myself awoken by my own dreams. Either by death, shock or struggle,  they jumpstart my heart and conscious into being set into the day. All I want is a good night's rest so my body and mind can heal but what do you do when it doesn't let you?

Quote of the day

"Be water my friend" - Bruce Lee

First Day of Junior Firefighting Academy

Thursday, April 24th. 2016
I started my first day of training at the Junior Fire Academy. It was the most grueling, physically demanding, enlightening, and fun experience I have had and I cannot wait till next Thursday to do it all again.
The amount of physical training definitely took a toll on my body physically. To the point that I had an adthma attack at the end and my nose was bleeding from the heat. The training involved lots of cardio intensive exercises and learning some life saving skills. Among other things we learning honor and respect. I gained a newfound understanding for the firefighters of my city.

Volunteering

I am trying to decide whether or not to become a firefighter in order to save more lives in multiple ways.

8th Week of EMT-B school

Well the 8th week of EMT-B school is almost over. As with it. I have just wrapped up my second lab. We are taking vitals, doing oxy ADMIN through NRBM and BVMs in accordance with the NREMT. I am loving it so far. Learning all this pre hospital care by hand and actions. Being able to practice and know what to hear for, finding out the different ways how to take blood pressure and pulse, really gives you a better appreciation for the people that do this daily. Though it is something that I myself will want to be doing daily, the chance to be able to have so much practice gets me incredibly excited. It isn't as easy as people would think but it is not as hard either, you just have to want to do it and have a passion for it. Everyday that I study, do a quiz, practice hands-on skills, with this course I feel I am learning something new and something meaningful that will benefit more than just me when I am done learning it. I love this oppurtunity that I have to take this course and I just hope I can, at the end of it, have all the skills and knowledge to pass the nremt exam and be able to have a chance to save peoples lives.

Common core math

Is bullshit!
Common Core Math is going to screw up our next couple of generations. It is a way of doing math in your head, yes, but not everyone processes math in their heads the way it teaches. It is proven ineffective and is already making kids hate math more than they should be if at all. It is an ineffective way for most people to learn how to do math in their head and is confusing to many children of the next couple of generations. Children are already struggling with these concepts and common core will just degrade our education system more than it is already at.

Going blind

My right eye is expected to go blind either in my late 30s or early 40s. You know what this makes me realize, or more or less reaffirm my beliefs. Life is short. Make the most of it with what you have and don't wait around to reach your full potential later on in life. Do everything you can now that you are young and have the energy and time to do it. You may not have the money but you can still do a lot. Learn another language. Reach a fitness goal. Run a marathon for a cause that affects you. Get involved in trying to improve you community. Civic engagement is at an all time low. Do something volunteer somewhere, anywhere for anything. Make a difference in someone's life. Hear and listen to someone's story. Do something that makes you happy that won't get you in trouble. Work on your art whatever it is, music, photography, dancing, drawing, painting or writing, etc. Go for a hike, breathe some fresh air and experience nature. You do not have to go far, find some hiking trails around your area. Just do something productive!

Mental Health

Mental health is a serious issue here in the United States that sadly is not treated with enough respect and dignity and is sometimes turned into either overly used terms or jokes. People that need help should be able to get it without feeling ashamed or shunned. It should also be easy access but that is another issue entirely.

BTS pictures from The Dark Knight Trilogy

http://www.johnnyetc.com/rare-photos-of-the-dark-knight-trilogy/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=jetc-ent&utm_campaign=promoted&utm_term=batman&utm_content=raredarkknight

It is a New Year

Worked on new years for 25 an hour. Met and talked with a lot of people and enjoyed the fireworks on the Las Vegas strip, it was cold but very satisfying. Here is to hopefully a better year. Here's to the year I am no longer a teenager, to the many wonderous things to come. What events, adventures, malevolent or benevolent, may we greet them with bravery and wisdom and hope for a great year, but not only hope but do the actions to make it great.